List of Billy Gardell Quotes

We have put together a list of some of the best Quotes that Written by Billy Gardell

Billy Gardell
Total Quotes 20
You need a wisecracking buddy standing next to you? that's the role for me. you got the guys who are knock-down, drag-out handsome. that's what people want to see. let that guy be the hero. but there's always a role for the everyman.
Hero People Guy
Yeah, i've done jim breuer's radio show a couple times, and i heard from larry the cable guy when i got 'mike & molly,' wishing me congratulations. i'm always the last one to the party, man. but that's okay. i got there.
Couple Congratulations Party
I always like to find those little mom-and-pop sandwich places, or diners. those are my favorite kind of places.
Mom Sandwiches Diners
I'm from minnesota! i used to work knuckleheads at the mall of america as a stand-up. i spent new year's there once. i'm not trying to namedrop.
New Year Years America
Stand-up will always come first. i've been doing it for 22 years, and nothing compares to that connection you have with the audience. it's euphoric.
Years Connections Firsts
As a comic, i've heard gunshots while i'm trying to get to sleep. i've performed where people wanted to do you harm after the show because of something you said.
Sleep People Trying
Everybody wants to be a better version of themselves - everybody. and i hope one day i can lose some weight. maybe, who knows, i'll hire myself a trainer and a fancy cook. in five years, maybe i'll be an action hero. then again, maybe i'll just be this guy. who knows? but the fun part is embracing the human side of that.
Fun Hero Years
I come from a working-class family in pittsburgh, whereas 'mike & molly' deals with the working class in chicago. i swear a little, but i pretty much talk the same. it's not like when you see someone like tim allen and he's a lot bluer onstage.
Class Chicago Pittsburgh
I have been a big guy all my life, i am not going to lose a bunch of weight, because then you're like that weird fat person that got skinny but still has a big head. i don't want to do that. so i'm just trying.
Guy Trying Weight
You know, i'm playing the mirage in vegas, the main room... about 5 percent of all comics end up as the main headliner on the vegas strip, so that's a big deal for me. getting to do my stand-up the way i have this summer is really what i've dreamed of since i was about 10 years old.
Summer Vegas Years
Whenever i realize i'm being a goofball, i write it down. when i release the joke onstage, i love watching the effect it has on the audience. no one wants to see someone talk who takes themselves too seriously.
Writing Want Realizing
The quickest way to defuse fear or insecurity or anger is usually humor. i think comics figure that out quickly, and, once you figure it out, you think, 'hey, if i can do this and get paid, that would be kind of cool.
Thinking Insecurity Would Be
  • Born: August 20, 1969
  • Occupation: Comedian
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