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Strangely enough, for many many years i didn't talk about my childhood and then when i did i got a ton of mail - literally within a year i got a couple of thousand letters from people who'd had a worse childhood, a similar childhood, a less-bad childhood, and the question that was most often posed to me in those letters was: how did you get past the trauma of being raised by a violent alcoholic?
-Dean Koontz
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Strangely Enough, For Many Many Years I

Dean Koontz
Strangely enough, for many many years i didn't talk about my childhood and then when i did i got a ton of mail - literally within a year i got a couple of thousand letters from people who'd had a worse childhood, a similar childhood, a less-bad childhood, and the question that was most often posed to me in those letters was: how did you get past the trauma of being raised by a violent alcoholic?
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Couple Past Years

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You can talk about things indirectly, but if you want to talk how people really talk, you have to talk r-rated. i mean i've got three incredibly intelligent daughters, but when you get mad, you get mad and you talk like people talk. when a normal 17-year-old girl storms out of the house or 15-year-old boy is mad at his mom or dad, they're not talking the way people talk on tv. unless it's cable.
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Let's say someone has experienced a violent trauma or betrayal: a child has been raped by a parent or has witnessed the destruction of someone he loves or has been so traumatized by the possibility of beatings and punishments that he's afraid to act. if the trauma is great enough, that person's life may become frozen, emotionally frozen even though he still gets up in the morning, is busy all day, and goes to bed at night. but there's this empty space that begins to fill with rage, rage toward everyone - the perpetrator, the people in the world who haven't suffered, even toward himself. (174)
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In fact, most of the time, people with similar information, similar beliefs and similar apparent choices will choose similar actions. so if you want to know why someone does what they do, start with what they know, what they believe and where they came from. dismissing actions we don't admire merely because we don't care enough to have empathy is rarely going to help us make the change we seek. it doesn't help us understand, and it creates a gulf that drives us apart.
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This is a devastating problem, is, the longer our children are in school, the worse they do. year after year after year, our children in america are falling further behind. our 3- and 4-year-olds enter kindergarten ok, and they fall further and further behind. each year, children in other countries are learning more than children in this country. and so the gap between american student performance in singapore and finland and south korea and canada and these other countries, the gap widens year after year after year.
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