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My mom is one of those really angry moms who gets mad at absolutely everything. once when i was a little kid, i accidentally knocked a flintstones glass off the kitchen table. she said, 'well, dammit, we can't have nice things.'

-Paula Poundstone

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My Mom Is One Of Those Really

Paula Poundstone

My mom is one of those really angry moms who gets mad at absolutely everything. once when i was a little kid, i accidentally knocked a flintstones glass off the kitchen table. she said, 'well, dammit, we can't have nice things.'

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    <p style="font-size: 1.2rem; font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 10px;">"my mom is one of those really angry moms who gets mad at absolutely everything. once when i was a little kid, i accidentally knocked a flintstones glass off the kitchen table. she said, &#039;well, dammit, we can&#039;t have nice things.&#039;"</p>
    <footer style="font-size: 1rem; font-weight: bold;">— Paula Poundstone</footer>
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More From Paula Poundstone

There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. there are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. and then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. the world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: what's up with this glass? excuse me? excuse me? this is my glass? i don't think so. my glass was full! and it was a bigger glass! who's been pinching my beer?

She comes to me when she wants to be fed. and after i feed her -- guess what -- she's off to wherever she wants to be in the house, until the next time she gets hungry. she's smart enough to know she can't feed herself. she's actually a very smart cat. she gets loved. she gets adoration. she gets petted. she gets fed. and she doesn't have to do anything for it, which is why i say this cat's taught me more about women, than anything my whole life.

I was always a person on my mother's hip in the kitchen. my mom really wanted her kids at her side as much as possible, and she worked in restaurants for over fifty years. and my grandfather had ten children, and he grew and prepared most of the food. my grandmother, on my mother's side, was the family seamstress and the baker. so my mom, the eldest child, was always in the kitchen with my grandpa and i was always in the production and restaurant kitchens and our own kitchen with my mom. and it's just something that has always spoken to me.

'dammit i'm mad' is 'dammit i'm mad' spelled backwards.

He began to trace a pattern on the table with the nail of his thumb. "she kept saying she wanted to keep things exactly the way they were, and that she wished she could stop everything from changing. she got really nervous, like, talking about the future. she once told me that she could see herself now, and she could also see the kind of life she wanted to have - kids, husband, suburbs, you know - but she couldn't figure out how to get from point a to point b.

There were two recording studios in bellingham. one was really expensive, a "nice studio." we were at the point where we were young and irreverent. we would scoff at the idea of a nice studio. "why would you want to go to a nice studio? oh wow, they have really expensive gear. ooh, that's really fancy. well we've got an eight-track. we've got it going on here." now that we have the resources, we're like, "oh wow, a nice studio is pretty nice! they do have nice outboards here. it's actually a pretty good place." it's funny how much changes so quickly.

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