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Howie's doctor told him to lose ten pounds, and since howie's been on a diet he's gained three.
-Janet Evanovich
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Howie's Doctor Told Him To Lose Ten

Janet Evanovich
Howie's doctor told him to lose ten pounds, and since howie's been on a diet he's gained three.
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Doctors Three Pounds

More From Janet Evanovich

I tell people that the scales lie. you may have played basketball and weighed 175 pounds, with a 30-inch waist, back when you were in college. and you may still weigh 175 at 55. but you probably have a 35-inch waist and you've probably lost 30 or 40 pounds of muscle -- and gained 30 or 40 pounds of fat. the tape measure doesn't lie. get that tape measure out and put it on your hips and your waist. keep checking it. and keep exercising and cutting those calories down until that tape measure gets close to where you were in your prime.
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The secret is contained in a three-part formula i learned in the gym: self confidence, a positive mental attitude, and honest hard work. many people are aware of these principles, but very few can put them into practice. every day i hear someone say, 'i'm to fat. i need to lose twenty-five pounds, but i can't. i never seem to improve.' i'd hate myself if i had that kind of attitude, if i were that weak. i can lose ten to forty pounds rapidly, easily, painlessly, by simply setting my mind to it.
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I realized that in those nine seasons i started out at about 225 pounds and i felt, you know, full figured fabulous woman but in those seasons i gained 75 pounds up to over 300 pounds all in front of the nation.
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Claims have been made that i've been on a strict workout routine regulated by co-stars, whipped into shape by trainers i've never met, eating sprouted grains i can't pronounce and ultimately losing 14 pounds off my 5'3" frame. losing 14 pounds out of necessity in order to live a healthier life is a huge victory. i'm a petite person to begin with, so the idea of my losing this amount of weight is utter lunacy. if i were to lose 14 pounds, i'd have to part with both arms. and a foot.
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The doctor: doctor song, you've got that face on again. river: what face? the doctor: the "he's hot when he's clever" face. river: this is my normal face. the doctor: yes it is. river: oh, shut up. the doctor: not a chance.
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I tried the paleo diet, which is the caveman diet - lots of meat. i tried the raw food vegan diet. and i tried the calorie restriction diet, which is the idea is that if you eat very, very little - if you're on the verge of starvation, you will live a very long time. whether or not you want to, of course, is the idea.
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